Script: Getting Off

The light at the end of her cigarette glows for an instant and illuminates the tip of her nose.

TONI

How long is this going to take?

ANGELA

I don’t know. You’re not supposed to smoke in the subway you know.

TONI

Whatever.

ANGELA

Just stay close, okay?

TONI

Fucking high heels!
(she grabs her friends arm to keep from falling)

ANGELA

Shit, Toni, you damn near pulled me over.

TONI

Damn. I’m sorry, okay? Wait, I need to hold onto you.

ANGELA

Okay, wait a minute. You’re pulling my coat off my shoulder. Take it easy would you?

TONI

Alright, okay. Don’t get your tits in a knot. I’m just trying not to fall down.

ANGELA

Just hold onto my shoulder.

TONI

Okay. Okay.

ANGELA

That’s better. Where the fuck are we?

TONI

I don’t know. Somewhere in the tunnel. This shit is hard to walk on.

ANGELA

No kidding.

TONI

We should have stayed on the train.

ANGELA

No way.

TONI

Way.

ANGELA

What? Did you happen to notice how it smelled in there?

TONI

I did actually. That’s why I lit a cigarette as soon as we got out.

ANGELA

Fucking stench was overpowering!

TONI

I know. Can you believe how bad human beings smell?

ANGELA

Worse than a dirty fucking diaper. I swear.

TONI

Hey wait. I see a light.

ANGELA

Where? I don’t see anything.

TONI

Down there. Way down there. Don’t you see it?

ANGELA

Oh yeah.

TONI

Looks like a long way.

ANGELA

Shit. This was a really bad idea. We need to get out of this fucking tunnel.

TONI

Yeah right. Just walk toward the light. We go back to the last station and we get out to the street. My Mom’s place is right there, and she’ll give us a lift back to the apartment. We just walk toward the light.

ANGELA

You know what that makes me think of?

TONI

No, what?

ANGELA

They say when people die, they walk through this tunnel toward the light.

TONI

Goddamn it Angie. That is too fucking morbid. Cut it out!

ANGELA

What do you mean? I’m not morbid. Hey, light another cigarette, would you?

TONI

What’s the matter? Afraid of the dark?

ANGELA

Asshole.

TONI

Sorry. That was bad.

ANGELA

Give me one.

TONI

K. Here.

ANGELA

What was that?

TONI

What?

ANGELA

Didn’t you hear that?

TONI

No, what?

ANGELA

That. Listen.
(listens attentively)

TONI

(listens attentively)
Oh that. What is that?

ANGELA

I don’t know.

TONI

What direction is it coming from?

ANGELA

I don’t know. I can’t tell. It’s so fucking dark. Wait.

TONI

Oh shit. There’s something out there.

ANGELA

Shit.

TONI

Keep walking.

ANGELA

Fuck, it’s behind us.

TONI

You think?

ANGELA

I think so.

TONI

Shit, I can’t walk any faster.

ANGELA

Take your shoes off.

TONI

What?

ANGELA

Take your shoes off. We can go faster that way.

TONI

Yuck. No way.

ANGELA

Why not?

TONI

I have nylons on!

ANGELA

Do you hear that?

TONI

Fuck. Alright, alright.

ANGELA

Good. Hurry.

TONI

Shit! I can’t believe this. Okay, they’re off.

ANGELA

Wait a minute. The light, it’s getting closer.

TONI

Yeah, so?

ANGELA

No, I mean it’s getting closer. Fast.

TONI

Really?

ANGELA

No kidding. Look at it.

TONI

Goddamn it.

ANGELA

Oh shit. It’s a train.

TONI

Shit!

ANGELA

Oh God, what do we do?

TONI

Uh…

ANGELA

We have to get off the tracks.

TONI

Oh God.

ANGELA

Oh God.

TONI

Wait. My lighter. Here. What do you see?

ANGELA

I don’t know.

TONI

Look. Over there. There’s a space.

ANGELA

Quick.

TONI

Get in. Quick.

ANGELA

Oh my God, it’s coming.

TONI

Hold me!

ANGELA

Shit.

TONI

Oh, God.

ANGELA

(Screams.)

TONI

(Screams.)

ANGELA

Holy shit.

TONI

Are you alright?

ANGELA

That was weird.

TONI

Damn.

ANGELA

I know.

TONI

(Laughs.)

ANGELA

(Laughs.)

TONI

Well, I’m glad that’s over.

ANGELA

No shit.

TONI

We should have stayed on the fucking train.

ANGELA

You may be right.

TONI

It’s too late now.

ANGELA

What happened to that noise we heard?

TONI

I don’t know.

ANGELA

I can’t hear it anymore.

TONI

No. Me either.

ANGELA

Let’s go.

TONI

Yeah.

ANGELA

I just want to get out of here.

TONI

Me too. Me too.

ANGELA

I think I peed my pants.

TONI

No way.

ANGELA

Way.

TONI

Oh God. That’s harsh.

ANGELA

Just a little.

TONI

Damn.

ANGELA

I know. It’s not too bad.

TONI

My feet are wet.

ANGELA

That’s gross.

TONI

Tell me about it.

ANGELA

Let’s get the fuck out of here.

TONI

This is a fucking nightmare!

ANGELA

I wish!

TONI

Wake me when it’s over.

ANGELA

Right.

TONI

Fucking subway. I hate the fucking subway.

ANGELA

Me too.

TONI

What was that?

ANGELA

Wait. I heard it again.

TONI

What?

ANGELA

You know. That noise.

TONI

Fuck.

ANGELA

What is that?

TONI

It’s probably the goddamn rats. Subway’s full of them.

ANGELA

Oh God. Light your lighter.

TONI

Wait. Here.

ANGELA

I can’t see anything.

TONI

Me either.

ANGELA

We just keep going straight down the tunnel.

TONI

Right.

ANGELA

The next station is right up there.

TONI

Yeah.

ANGELA

We’re almost there.

TONI

Amen.

ANGELA

Oh wow, look over there.

TONI

Stairs!

ANGELA

Yes! I was worried about that.

TONI

Me too.

ANGELA

Hey, girl, we made it.

TONI

Woo Hoo.

ANGELA

We are outta here!

TONI

Shit Angie, my feet!

ANGELA

Pretty bad?

TONI

Black.

ANGELA

Oh.

TONI

Wet.

ANGELA

I’m sorry hon. Just don’t think about it. Here, sit down over here and put your shoes on. But don’t look.

TONI

Ugh.

ANGELA

We’ll be home soon.

TONI

Yeah. And I am gonna strip naked and jump in the shower. And these clothes, I’m gonna burn them.

ANGELA

I know. Me too.

TONI

Well, actually, I think I’ll put them in a big garbage bag and seal it and take it straight out to the dumpster.

ANGELA

Right.

TONI

Right.

ANGELA

Toni?

TONI

Yeah?

ANGELA

Next time the train breaks down?

TONI

Yeah, we stay on it.

ANGELA

And Toni?

TONI

Yeah?

ANGELA

Don’t tell anybody.

TONI

My lips are sealed.

ANGELA

This never happened.

TONI

What?

ANGELA

Right. What?

TONI

Okay. Let’s go home.